You might be shocked to hear I don’t like Elf on the Shelf.
I know it is weeks past Christmas, but stay with me. It is relevant.
I don’t like the elf for lots of reasons, enough to fill an entire book and then some. I’ll spare you the long rant. Basically, I find an elf moving around the house at night creepy and I hate the pressure it puts on kids to be “good” and on parents to remember to move the damn thing.
I know. Geez mom. Way to make it all about you.
According to my 8-year-old daughter, we are the ONLY family in the world to not have a spying elf and it isn’t fair. We had no less than 20 conversations revolving around the injustice of it all.
“Mom, you just don’t understand.”
Nope. I don’t.
“I will make it clothes.”
“It will be fun.”
“It is a good lesson to kids on being good.”
She finally realized there was no budging on the issue and made her own. Only this little one isn’t an elf. She is a fairy, she is named Peppermint and she moves around the house the entire year.
THE ENTIRE YEAR.
Bam. Got you mom. Now you have to move the fairy around the house every day or I will lose faith in magic and shit like that.
At first, I played along and moved dear Peppermint all over the house. It was actually fun to pose her in the bowl of oranges on the counter, or hide her in the Christmas tree or have her hanging with baby Jesus in the nativity.
But I got busy.
Don’t get me wrong. I am a fun mom. I swear I am. I play dolls and games and tell stories.
But come on.
I have to remember to move the fairy every night.
Every. Single. Night.
It is too much.
Yesterday at breakfast, my girl tells me Peppermint hasn’t moved since a few days after Christmas.
“Mom,” she says. “Do you think Peppermint will ever move?”
I think I see tears in her eyes. Real tears, folks.
“I don’t know love,” I say and silently promise myself to move the damn fairy every day for the rest of my life. “I think she was just really tired from the holidays. I’m sure she will move soon.”
“I hope so,” she says.
The second she is out the door, I take Peppermint out of the doll house bed and put her on the mantle holding a few candy canes.
She comes home and notices right away.
“She moved!” she says.
“Can’t wait to see what she will do tomorrow.”
We leave the house an hour later for her keyboard lesson. My boy decides to stay home to work on his homework.
When we come back, Peppermint has moved again.
This time she is sitting with a doll playing a game my girl created the day before.
“Wow!” she says. “I can’t believe it.”
My boy comes over all smiles and snuggles up close to me.
“I will move Peppermint mom,” he whispers in my ear. “Just look how happy she is.”
And then my heart exploded.