About

I’m glad you are here.

I started this blog in 2013 with the words: “Once upon a time there was a mother who wanted to do something other than dishes and laundry.”

This version of myself feels sort of familiar.

It ended with the words: “She took a deep breath and just went for it.”

This I recognize.

I’ve spent the last nearly decade breathing in and plunging forward.

I’ve been as transparent as I can, exploring motherhood, depression, and body image. There are things I withhold to protect my friends and family, and I’m attempting to explore new territory with my fiction writing. The blog, like me, is a work in progress.

Parenting teenagers has a way of humbling you and making you grow up.

I currently have three manuscripts in the works, and I may publish a short story collection at the end of this year. I journal daily, and although I still feel a bit queasy each time I hit publish, I’m returning to the place I began.

I considered renaming the blog and changing the header image to reflect my growth, but for now, they still fit. My son drew me as Super Mom with a sword by my side and a mask across my eyes. This feels right and somehow important.

Welcome to Bridgette Tales.

Everybody has a story. Here’s a little of mine.

I began my blog after being cast in the spoken word show Listen to Your Mother. It was the catalyst for reconnecting with my creativity, and the people I met through the process continue to inspire me.

Years later, I was cast in the final performance in San Francisco. This one wasn’t recorded, but you can read the piece I read aloud: The mom bathing suit vs. the hipster pool

I’ve grown a lot in my art over the last few years thanks to the wonderful support of my friend Anna. Check out her amazing blog, and beautiful artwork, at loscotoff.com.

If you are new here, you may want to read my top blog posts:

Contacts

Email: bridgettetales@gmail.com

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/bridgettetales

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bridgettetales

Twitter: https://twitter.com/bridgettetales

139 thoughts on “About”

    • Dear Linda,

      Let me give you one man’s perspective, for what it’s worth. I think what the modern culture defines as “heavy” or “overweight” is gorgeous, and it is much more appealing to me than the anorexic, emaciated “standard” of fashionable beauty being pushed on society nowadays.

      Yes, there is absolutely more to you than just your weight, but take courage–in my eyes (and I’m sure in many other men’s eyes as well), your weight is NOT a detriment to what makes you attractive–it is one of the many legitimate aspects of what makes you genuinely beautiful!!!

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    • Bridgette, my wife has always been “chunky” and I have always found her beautiful. In fact, I loved her figure since I met her and we were single. She always talks about losing weight and trying to be thinner. Since we were dating. However, I still see a beautiful woman. I believe that heavy is the ideal healthy weight. It looks beautiful on you and it looks beautiful on her.
      If I wanted a thin woman, I would have dated a thin girl. Yet, I have always liked chunky women.
      David in California.

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  3. I stumbled upon your blog (“Exposed by my children…”) and I was so moved by it that I wanted to reach out to thank you.
    I too struggle with body issues, as every other female does, especially since joining the not-so-cool club of being 40. I often (read ‘every waking moment’) dibble dabble in self-loathing and hopelessness of not having the figure I had even one year ago. And in my mind, my beautiful son cannot possibly see his mama as anything but ‘big’ and ‘old’, and I believe my amazing partner has perfected his lies while he tells me daily how beautiful I am and how lucky he is.
    Myself? I see me as a blob… who has a closet of pretty clothes all 3 sizes too small while I hide myself in sweats and oversized t-shirts.
    But your blog made me remember when, just a few days ago, my son drew a picture of me and was upset because he couldn’t draw me pretty enough. And before that, he was on the edge of a DEF-CON 3 meltdown because my hair was so pretty I shouldn’t get a hair cut! And all of his Ewww’s! with covered eyes when my boyfriend kisses me in front of him…then only to ask him “Will I have a pretty girlfried like you when I’m older?”
    Your words remind me that how my son sees me is much more important, and more true, than how I see me at this particular point it my life.
    Thank you.

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    • Dear Kim,

      Let me give you one man’s perspective. I have always thought that a woman is just beginning to look her best when she turns 40. And I think a woman with some substance to her body is far, far more attractive than the anorexic modern fashion-model “standard” of beauty!

      So, take courage–I have to believe that I am not the only man with good taste who appreciates truly beautiful ladies like you! It sounds like your partner is right on target, and is not lying to you at all. And I don’t think your son’s vision is distorted by the idealistic prism of youth, either! Sometimes children can see and perceive reality better than us “sophisticated” adults do!

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  5. Bridgette, I, like so many others, saw the FB post of your beach trip. I’m over 60 and have been in the same situation, without internet exposure, and know of the body battles. I am so happy for you that your children see you for who you are and not for your physical appearance. You, your love of family and the world around you are what matter. So glad they reminded you of that! They are wise beyond their years and you are blessed to have them…

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  7. Very brave of you. I wouldn’t have found your blog if it weren’t for the FB post. There is a village of like minded people and feel peace in knowing that. Children see our true selves, not what society has made us to believe what should be.

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  9. I saw your article and celebrate you! My nearly 6 year relationship recently ended in large part to the water retention/inflammation caused from several health issues caused by stress. The pounds I gained became more important to him than who I am as a person. He was unable to support me emotionally because he thought if I went to the gym, I would feel better. I had adrenal problems that caused hypothyroid and hormone problems that left me exhausted. I learned one in 4 women now suffer from hyperthyroid. I am on the mend and the inflammation is starting to diminish. Learning to accept myself where I was at, contrary to the messages I was receiving around me was a challenge. Thank you for sharing your story to help others.

    Much love and many blessings,
    Arianna

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  10. I some how came across your blog on Exposed By My Children…,although I have never had a weight issue, we all seem to carry our heavy load of perceived imperfections around with us through life. Your blog made me tear up and then smile so I emailed to to myself to serve as a reminder that we are all more then just a some of our parts. Thank you:)

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  11. Dear Bridgette,

    When I saw your blog and looked at your picture, I thought “That could be a picture of me!” I am quite a bit older than you, and it’s just been in the past couple of years that I would even dare think about wearing a pair of shorts in public. It has taken me too many years to come to grips with the fact that I have never been a “skinny girl” and never will be if I live to be a 100. I have dieted, tried exercise programs, tried starving myself and the minute I stop doing any of those things the few pounds I lost seem to find me again and climb right back on. It doesn’t take courage to be who you are, I’ve learned, it takes acceptance of what is, and knowing you are beautiful and that you don’t have to meet the false media driven image of beauty that isn’t healthy. Courage? Pah! Why would anyone need courage to be who they are? I bask in the love of my family and friends and am a happier person now that I’ve learned to accept myself.

    I love your blog, by the way and noticed some very familiar places in some of your photos. I think we must live in the same area. I am going to sign up to follow you, and plan to read your previous posts, too. I love the way you write, and wonder if you might not want to try your hand at writing as a profession?

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  12. Hi Bridget:
    I was really happy that you shared your story! Society has made us all think that you have to be like Twiggy to be perfect. How about taking care of the kids? Helping them read, taking them on a trip to explore, etc.? Doesn’t this count for something? Sure, we can all work to slim and be healthy like you mentioned. However, you have to be really happy on the inside first. We all forget that are souls are with us here and long after we depart from this world! Thanks for you courage and reminder of what is truly important in this world! Blessings.

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  14. what a beautiful thing your children said……. gives us all an incentive to just be ourselves and yes stay healthy, we are all different, come from different backgrounds and genes, the important thing is I think your a darn good MOM………………………..

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  15. Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts about the beach photo. It was simply beautiful and it was most definitely something I needed to hear. It echoed in my soul. May God Bless you every day in every way.

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  16. Hi, I just wanted to put it out there that beauty really is in the eye of the beholder. I didn’t think the picture on the beach was bad at all, in fact, you look like my mom. Even though I have children of my own, (7), and I weigh a cool 95 pounds, I can’t stand my stomach. My stomach is COMPLETELY flat, but it is still wrinkled. When I stand, it looks almost clean. When I bend over, I can really see the wrinkles. The moral of the story is, “society”, and by that I mean the media industry, has all of us schmoes living in a dream world. In truth, even hollywood is ugly, underneath all that makeup. Hence the term, HollyWIERD!!! Women need to stop being so judgmental about themselves, and accept their beauty for what it is, a small piece of the whole!

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  17. Sorry but it’s too obvious that you made that story up since your son is less than 2yrs old. You just wanted to post a made up situation/story to get on that anti fat shaming fad that’s popular now.

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  19. Hi there Bridgette,

    I’m Amanda. You don’t know me, and I don’t know you. But I saw an article on yahoo news about a woman whose children took her picture at the beach and made her realized what a beautiful person she it. Turns out…..that was you 🙂 I found the link back to your blog and started reading. I haven’t read all of the posts, just a few. But the few I have read really captivated me as your life sounds just like my life…well….to an extent. But I admire your writing, I admire you as a person and I’ve only been reading about you for the last half an hour but it really makes me want to read more and keep reading. I’ve bookmarked your blog and I will continue to read this daily. I’m sure you didn’t imagine people from all over the world would be reading your blog but it’s amazing. I’m not sure where you’re from or what you do but I want to know because from the few pictures and stories I have read you really are a beautiful person, just like your kids said 🙂
    Thanks for sharing your life with others. Makes us feel like we’re not alone.

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  20. Here’s a poem for you. Mom. My Mother’s Arms
    By Al Letcher

    (Inspired by my wife, Jane, and the neighbor’s baby, Savannah McCutchan)

    My mother’s arms were strong.
    They held me for long hours while I slept, cried and fussed my way through an illness.

    My mother’s arms were tender.
    They picked me up when I had fallen and helped me along the way again.

    My mother’s arms were warm.
    They wrapped around me when I came in from playing out in the cold.

    My mother’s arms were smart.
    They guided me through my lessons in school.

    My mother’s arms were always there,
    Until she passed away.

    I miss those arms that hugged me in a special way.
    I miss those arms that made me, the way I am today.

    I miss my mother, but I see her everyday.
    I see her when my wife holds the neighbor’s baby girl in her arms.

    I see her when my daughter wraps her arms around her pregnant belly.
    I see her when my granddaughters hug their baby dolls.

    Mothers never die.
    They live forever in another mother’s arms.

    Dedicated to, and in loving memory of,
    Frances M. Letcher, my mother.

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  22. I just read about your children and how they took the picture of you on the beach and what you wrote. You are blessed beyond words to have raised such amazing children. I very much like what you wrote and how you wrote. God bless you and your children. So lovely.

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  23. Hi beautiful Mom… I just read your article on MSN with your picture and how your kids see you. My Mom is 85 and has dementia. She lives in a nursing home and I finally just had the chance to spoil her with clothes. She had been a size 24 woman for a long time and now she is a 16 woman. She didn’t ever treat herself to much of anything except food, and it was so fun to get past all of her resons for not needing clothes and pop a hot pink top on her and some Jacylyn Smith Jeans and hear,”I like this! Tres gay!” I think she is beautiful and I love this phase in her life.

    My kids are grown and I am a soon to be divorced 51 year old. I was just thinking this a.m. how many different ways our society expects women to be and there was not any support for my passage into menopause and no kids. I also can’t do my nursing career anymore due to disability. I was saying to myself being a Mom and wife doesn’t reap much at this point in life. I thought now I am still supposed to be sexy, beautiful, active, care about everyone else, working, talented and on it goes. I am so happy you can love your body as you are because even if you made the “ideal” than there is some other mark that must be made and on it goes. The important thing is loving who you are and you must be precious for your children to see your beauty.

    My son used to take pictures of the way my hair was turned up on the back of my head and my daughter wrote me some sweet poems.

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  24. Hi! Bonnie here! I have only begun to read your work. A labor of love truly! Nice work, direct from the heart. Sweet, simple… keep going!

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  25. Exposed by my children was so heartwarming because your children let you see yourself through their eyes but it also gave us a view of what motherhood should really be. . .about the children. You forget/forgot about your feelings of being less than the “perfect woman” and made your children’s day/days what they should be. Hooray for you!!!

    Now for encouragement.

    I, too, was never thin. I was 5′ tall in the first grade and always heavy. A lifetime passes. At 44 I was diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes. Had we known when I was in first grade the things we know now, we would have known I was insulin resistant. We would have stopped my launch into puberty at 10 (which virtually ended my growth as I am 5’4″ now) and would have begun to control those things in my life.

    At 44, I refused to take medication for my diabetes and have controlled it with diet and exercise (fully controlled as I now have normal blood work), for all of these years ( I am now 62),and lost 90lbs from eating correctly. As a senior citizen I am told I am hot (is that possible?) and my health is perfect.

    The point of this is, when you find your way to your destination, you will arrive. Until you arrive, enjoy the trip and continue to do your best!! Your value is immeasurable.

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  27. Bridgette –

    You are so awesome! I look forward to reading your posts. – Keep them coming. There are thousands of moms out here that feel we are walking in your shoes. You are tough as nails and stronger than steel! Keep up the great work!

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  29. Hi Bridgette! So glad I found your blog! I look forward to reading more of your adventures and learning from you in blogging and motherhood. I love your honest and loving voice. It’s good to find fellow moms like you who are doing everything they can to make a positive influence in our children’s lives. 🙂

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  30. I’m so happy to have stumbled upon your words via Facebook this evening. Depression, parenting, body image.. It speaks to me all. Thank you for writing.

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  31. Hi Bridgette,

    I don’t know if you remember me but we met at festival of little houses three summers ago. I’ve loved reading your blog since we met. Thank you for the beautiful, touching, and most of all, relatable experiences you so eloquently share.

    Hope to see you at the festival if you decide to attend this year.

    Keep up the good work Mama.

    Best,

    Holly

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  32. Saw your blog a couple of year’s back, Not sure why it struck me but it resonated as being wholesome. It opened my eye’s as a Father and having a child of my own I guess ,; going through the emotions of growing pangs, ups and downs, Joys of watching my little one grow to be a young woman to a life of her own.
    I remember you well like the story of the fine red thread sown through the heart; there is an attachment and a link to all our lives here; thank you for that!
    As a male it’s always hard to express how we feel, but will some it up like this……….
    we are all Gods eyes ears and mouth pieces, we are a part of him, so he knows everything, hears everything , See’s everything!
    He also knows what a great job you have been doing!

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    • Wow Mike, this may be the kindest comment I’ve ever received. You have made my week! Thank you so much for taking the time to write those words to me. I needed to hear them more than you know. Thank you! God Bless you.

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  33. Hi Bridgette, I’ve come back to check on you again; You always have exciting things going on!
    As I have stated in my last comment about that fine red thread and we all here being attached at the heart; Can feel the stresses of everyone’s fears living in these times that we call today…..
    Don’t fret….. You are still doing Your fair share to make the world a better place and You give so many Hope with Your Amazing Life. just a little nudge to let you know everything is going to be ok!
    When you Sit Back and think about the family You have created here….You Are So Loved!
    I want to thank you for all the years you have shared from Your heart!

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  45. Pingback: White Coats | A Short Story - Anna Loscotoff Author

  50. Thank you for following my blog. I just read your “About” and love the story of how your children took the photos and said how beautiful you looked. Body image is a strange thing, my wife well remembers her mum saying “Aren’t your arms fat” (or words to that effect) when she was young and it has stuck with her to this day. I’m just like your children and I tell her how beautiful she is, but she simply says “Don’t be silly!”)

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    • Thank you for giving my blog a look. Yes, body image is a tricky thing. Women’s bodies are examined at a very young age and every part of them is commented on. It takes a lot of healing to realize those critiques are more about the person giving them than, or worse, designed to control women by keeping them insecure. Thank you again for visiting my blog and have a wonderful day!

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