gazing through bubbles refracted light
I search the curves for the parts of me
stuck within the heavy paralysis of night

unrecognizable, untouched I smile despite
treading choppy waters of the darkest sea
gazing through bubbles refracted light

probing tired feelings I write and rewrite
hurts with bleeding fingers, piled debris
stuck within the heavy paralysis of night

colorful galaxies explode with meteorite
quickness, explosions blasting truths proxy
gazing through bubbles refracted light

exhaustion whispers hurt meant to incite
rioting wildness, love’s saddest symphonies
stuck within the heavy paralysis of night

finger poised to break rainbows requite
I pause, struck by life’s familiar frailty
gazing through bubbles refracted light
stuck within the heavy paralysis of night

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This was my attempt at exploring my reoccurring seasons of depression and loneliness through the format of the villanelle. There’s something appealing to me about writing poetry with strict formats—perhaps it’s a false sense of control when I’m feeling so helpless and vulnerable. Let me know what you think of my first attempt at this type of poem and if you are in the dark right now please know you aren’t alone.