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Poetry: Rainbow Reflections

gazing through bubbles refracted light
I search the curves for the parts of me
stuck within the heavy paralysis of night

unrecognizable, untouched I smile despite
treading choppy waters of the darkest sea
gazing through bubbles refracted light

probing tired feelings I write and rewrite
hurts with bleeding fingers, piled debris
stuck within the heavy paralysis of night

colorful galaxies explode with meteorite
quickness, explosions blasting truths proxy
gazing through bubbles refracted light

exhaustion whispers hurt meant to incite
rioting wildness, love’s saddest symphonies
stuck within the heavy paralysis of night

finger poised to break rainbows requite
I pause, struck by life’s familiar frailty
gazing through bubbles refracted light
stuck within the heavy paralysis of night

This was my attempt at exploring my reoccurring seasons of depression and loneliness through the format of the villanelle. There’s something appealing to me about writing poetry with strict formats—perhaps it’s a false sense of control when I’m feeling so helpless and vulnerable. Let me know what you think of my first attempt at this type of poem and if you are in the dark right now please know you aren’t alone.

24 thoughts on “Poetry: Rainbow Reflections”

  2. I didn’t know that you are battling depression, Bridgette. I’ve been taking a “happy pill” every day for years now. Tried to come off of it recently and it wasn’t good. I feel your sadness, it’s so hard to deal with… Hugs.

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  6. So so so real and vulnerable. I don’t know the poetry form so can’t comment on that but I can definitely say your poem was fantastic. I pray you find your way beyond the paralysis of night to see morning’s light —it is on the horizon. Cheers 🙏🏽💗🙏🏽

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  7. You did an excellent job with this poetic form. I have written a couple of villanelles and they are challenging. I do like how the repetition makes you go deeper. I can see how this process would ease depression.

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    • Thank you, LuAnne. It was challenging and it does make you seek out a metaphor that can be used throughout that also can have multiple meanings. I think I’d like to rework this one again at some point, but it was certainly a good start.

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  10. Totally agree with the comfort of a poetic structure. On my wall right now is an Italian sonnet written to my wife as she endured chemotherapy for breast cancer. (22 years ago; she survives, I am so pleased to say.) The poem is atrocious, but wouldn’t have been written at all without the allure of the structure. I gathered a certain triumph lurking between the words. Was I wrong?

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    • I’m so happy to hear your wife survived and that the structure of the Italian sonnet allowed you to express your feelings through poetry. You are correct in seeing a bit of triumph in my words. I’ve been in darkness that’s lasted years, but through therapy I know can recognize the impermanence of these phases and now they last far shorter than before. I suppose I was attempting to look at both the fragility of mood and my acceptance I want to keep living.

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