poetry: bruises

my clenched words released
burn holes in the good pillows
where my mascara ran
where I slept propped up
where you don’t see me

I can’t shapeshift anymore
my grandmother’s lava burns
where hands pressed down
where softness was cut out
where I hit the window

slow my words down
float upon the current
where light seeps in
where questions are pain
where the answer is love

poetry: floating together

find me where winter waters flow
honey thick. where ferns weave baskets
cradling colored stones. listen for songs
dripping down cave walls, tiny fairy feet
dancing delicately on crushed shells, soft
foamy voices calling your name. follow
them. do not despair as earthen gravity
releases you. let go. reach through murky
darkness until our fingertips merge. hold
tight as our toes taste stars. I’m beside
you watching our bubbly breath connect
inside and outside. beautifully untethered.

Dream with me

When children are small you can sprinkle nutritional yeast on millet and tell them it’s fairy dust. With a word, it becomes so. Such is the power of language. What if we could do the same with our dreams? Here’s a poem and flash fiction rambling on about such things. Let me know what you think.


little shadow

perched on a purple wall
staring at my sleeping child

what do you see shadow bird?

do you see. see like me?

my grandfather became cloud
grandmother became butterfly.

I sit in her chair. I sing with his voice.

what will be left for her when I, transform?

maybe I become you.
maybe I watch from a wall.

flying with one word.
staying with another. word.

dream me alive. over and over and over.
clove and nutmeg. owl spreading wings.

forest hears, nothing.

another dream


Transform

One night during a dream of chaos and war a woman gives birth to a baby with hair the color of fresh snow. The baby blinks at the woman with eyes as green as ancient ferns and coos like a dove. What if instead of forgetting the baby when she woke the woman decides to name her Mabel and she becomes as real as coffee.

The woman dresses the dream baby in clothes the color of fresh marigolds and wears her close to her chest in a carrier woven of the softest wool. She takes the baby out into the rain and her laugh becomes lightning. The world sparks around them and glows brighter.

The plants in the woman’s house grow with the baby—greener and taller, greener and taller until the woman is forced to cut through them with a large knife, like an explorer in a jungle. She and the baby laugh at the silliness of it as birds make nests in her living room and a family of rabbits discovers the perfect place to live within her closet.

They spend most days outdoors so Mabel can make the grass thicker, the trees taller, and the flowers bolder. The neighbors don’t know what’s making their gardens grow and the woman decides not to tell them. Not everyone believes as strongly as she does and she fears their disbelief will pull the child away.

When Mabel starts walking the woman takes her outside in the middle of the night and upon seeing the full moon the child begins to sing. The tiny lilting notes cause the stars to dance and the moon to move closer and closer to the Earth. The woman knows this won’t go unnoticed and will have terrible consequences, but she hesitates to act because love defies logic and gravity. Love defies most things.

Mabel however makes the choice for her, wiggling out of her grasp and floating toward the moon. The baby with hair as white as snow returns back into the dream where she was born and the woman walks home alone. Her house feels different but she smiles the same because Mabel is as real as coffee and her physical absence changes nothing. She wraps herself in wool and dream walks to visit her child.

Such is the power of language. And love.

poetry: somewhere you hold me

speaking stories of us into water
whispers become wanderings

look outward, lean inward

watch raindrops race time
square windowpanes, falling
pooled hope, softened palms 

say something about rum rivers 
while I drink old coffee

touch lace lines, anywhere
forgive becomes forgotten

think blankets, thick fog
old birds underneath
hidden

forward, backward, pretend
time is the same

warmth seeks warmth
close becomes closer

find me

52 Photo Challenge: Week 51-A Thousand Words

“If a picture is worth a thousand words, then the imagination is worth a thousand pictures.” —J.E.B. Spredemann

This week’s assignment for the 52 photo challenge was to photograph something meaningful to you. As it’s Christmas Eve, I decided to share some decorations around my house that hold meaning for me and my family.

I hope you enjoy these photos and you have a wonderful holiday.


#1: Although this isn’t my grandma Kate’s tree, she had one just like it. You can’t turn it on for too long as the bulbs get nice and hot.

#2: My mother-in-law Janet made this ornament for our family.

#3: I’ve had this tree topper since my first Christmas away from home in 1995.

#4: My parents bought this ornment their first Christmas together.

#5: I’ve had this playset since before the kids were born and I have many fond memories of them playing with it under the tree.

#6: These are vintage and remind me of my children.

#7: Our Christmas cactus bloomed and it reminds me of my mother-in-law.

#8: My mother made this when she was a kid in school and although it’s broken and chipped, it wouldn’t be Christmas without it.

#9: I always put my kids in matching striped pajamas.

#10: This doily belonged to my grandma Pat and it’s draped over my grandma Kate’s chair. Both of them are with me.

  • Photos were taken with Olympus OM-D and edited with ON1 Photo RAW
  • If you want to join the 52 Photo Challenge, you can find all the information at nicolesy.com

52 Photo Challenge
Week 1: Bokeh
Week 2: Silhouette
Week 3: Black and White
Week 4: Motion Blur
Week 5: Texture
Week 6: Framing
Week 7: Leading Lines
Week 8: Negative Space
Week 9: Patterns
Week 10: Symmetry
Week 11: Green
Week 12: Sidelight
Week 13: Sense of Scale
Week 14: One Lens
Week 15: Series
Week 16: Flat Lay
Week 17: Behind the Scenes
Week 18: Water
Week 19: Blurry Foreground
Week 20: Unique Perspective
Week 21: Shadow
Week 22: Food
Week 23: Abstract
Week 24: Reflection
Week 25: Contrast Color
Week 26: Think in Threes
Week 27: Starburst
Week 28: Low Perspective
Week 29: Macro
Week 30: Backlight
Week 31: Big Sky
Week 32: Dominant Color
Week 33: Fill the Frame
Week 34: Spot Metering
Week 35: Handheld Long Exposure
Week 36: S Curve
Week 37: Shoot Through
Week 38: Faces
Week 39: Blossom
Week 40: Environmental Portrait
Week 41: Texture Overlay
Week 42: Details
Week 43: Season
Week 44: Fog & Steam
Week 45: Nighttime
Week 46: Analog
Week 47: Sunrise/Sunset
Week 48: Lens Flare
Week 49: Panorama
Week 50: Street

poetry: what a sigh becomes

velvet cheek pressing against me
pink lips sucking air
my body knows this

memory becomes language
speaking not words but sensations
primal swaying
songs of ancestors

tenderness blooms here

sweet milky breath
tiny fingers grasping shirt

seedling, daffodil drops, skyward

Mother Earth swells larger
willow trees dancing
petal skinned waters

paper cranes taking flight

you sigh
it becomes a smile
now a laugh

are you chasing winds?
riding swollen ocean waves?
smelling ancient ferns?

moonlight sings your name
sunshine whispers its secrets
lean into softness

stars remember everything
you will tell me someday

you will tell me

all of it

Poetry: Constrict

He had a picture of me 
on his work desk. A boa 
constrictor wrapped around 
my neck. He’d say,
“She wasn’t even scared.” 

His framed pride
didn’t match my fear, 
so I pretended.

Not a snake charmer, 
I learned to drink venom.
Walk through glass. Palms
up, always. Let me prove 
how good I am, like sweet
orange trees. Climb. Take
cover beneath my limbs, 
I’ll take all the blame. Sorry
for the storm, for freezing
pomegranate hearts. Orphan
without warmth—I know. 

Look, watch me spin so
bright. Sing to the moon. 
Ride through a rice field, kick
dust onto the snow-white
cranes. See me create starlight
babies with magical breath—
lean in. Smell them. 
Part me. 
Part you. 
Us.

Branches. You see?
Beautiful are the buds
bearing your blue eyes.

Maybe you had to move
away. Once, no twice.
You needed to be further
from this mess; this me.

Further and further.
I see.

Neck, boa, constrict—
my words press like sap
pushing through bark.
Not fearless, but what
will too late feel
like when words sit stuck
inside. No, say it all. Look,
do you see? “She wasn’t even

scared.”

poetry: kissed

once I was sunkissed
now, not kissed at all
not here in this place
where the winter moon
wakes me
singing tomorrows
through mist
through falling leaves
through frost paintings
no, not like that
raven songs, not doves
trinkets
feathers
bits of string
touch my fingertips
my lips
icy secrets whispered
deep into blanket forts
no, not sunkissed
not kissed at all
still warm

poetry: moonset

masked moonlight wakes me
pulling dreams backward, inward
pulling body forward, outward
five steps and I’m outside
bare feet on weathered wood
yes, moon, what do you want
watch me descend, it says
casting legato light across waves
as sapient stars nod, blinking in agreement
what else can I do but listen

opalescent ocean dances below
sings softly of forgetting
or is it forgiving
maybe it wants me to bleed
shedding mawkish memories
dance, move, swing your arms
let go, it calls
can it be so simple

silver moon transforms
briefly mimics sunlight 
before sinking
below the waves
below the horizon
below my pained core
with a final golden gasp
it calls out to me
yes, I hear you

folding, folding
I tuck the words inside—
my moonset gift
swaying, swaying
I rock with the waves
under billowy blankets
until morning comes


Note: Both of these photos are of the moon setting at around 1 a.m. If you look closely in the second one you might see stars.