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Poetry: Thanksgiving

I forgive myself for idealizations of holidays past
For quick crying between wishes
For wiping tears on my pumpkin apron
For missing the harvest moon 
For yelling at myself for falling short
For taking too many or not enough pictures
For missing the sweetness of giggly formality
For not savoring the warmth of deep red wine
For demanding you write on the thankful chalkboard tree
For unrealistic expectations and not asking for help
For not seeing paper-thin leaves on the carpet as beautiful
For forgetting the windowsill wishbone
For making cranberry sauce when you just want canned
For not snuggling under warm blankets
For playing martyr music to myself

I am grateful it’s never too late to learn hard lessons
For pretty glass pumpkins bought 20 years ago
For delicious pies from Apple Hill
For crochet leaf coasters and sparkling cider refills
For round crackers and salty meat
For the mystic splendor of deer on the ridge
For marching bands and behemoth balloons
For bad jokes and big laughter
For pink cheeks and crackling firelight
For making you write on the thankful chalkboard tree
For the perfect turkey placemats for four
For forgiveness and second chances
For squirrel salt & pepper shakers
For snuggles and holding hands
For midnight sandwiches and full bellies
For every moment we’ve had together

*Thank you for supporting my blog this year. Your kindness keeps me going. May your Thanksgiving, if you celebrate, be worry-free and wonderful.

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Photography: Monochrome Nature

“Well, we all make mistakes, dear, so just put it behind you. We should regret our mistakes and learn from them, but never carry them forward into the future with us.” -L.M. Montgomery

Yesterday I took family photographs of a dear friend and her beautiful family. It was a wonderful opportunity for me to stretch my photography skills and offer this service to people I love. What I learned was…I need to learn a lot more. Although it went well, as far as flow and everyone staying in wonderful moods, I didn’t do great with lighting or poses. While some of the photos were beautiful, others fell short. Ultimately, I failed in a lot of big ways.

When I woke up this morning I felt defeated and upset. I wanted to do so much better. While I could let this setback derail me, after coffee and a long hot shower, I’ve decided to keep going. I think after the new year I’ll enroll in some photography classes, invest in some new software, and keep trying. Everything is a learning experience and the only way to get better is to keep going.

My photos this week were all taken before the family shots and were edited to be black-and-white. I hope you enjoy them and have a wonderful week.

  • Photos were taken with an Olympus OM-D and edited with ON1 Photo RAW

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Poetry: The Mall Santa in November

Long before the first whiff of candy canes rise
A bauble-covered evergreen, enormous in size
Arrives in the mall for all the holiday-hooked
While fat turkey waits to be basted and cooked

Sitting center stage on a velvet couch of green
Glad tidings brought forth before casserole of bean
Dear Father Christmas, old Santa Claus himself
Precedes eggnog, gingerbread, or elf on the shelf

November’s mall Santa has quite an easy gig
Before shopping gets desperate, pushy, and big
Fur-lined coat, hair of white, smiling with ease
He waves at the shoppers, aiming only to please

So if you like your Saint Nicholas full of glee
Don’t wait until the line snakes around the tree
November’s the time to gather up all the holly
And visit the mall for your dose of the Big Jolly

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Photography: Effie Yeaw Nature Center

“I felt my lungs inflate with the onrush of scenery—air, mountains, trees, people. I thought, ‘This is what it is to be happy.’”―Sylvia Plath

This morning my daughter and I visited the beautiful trails around Effie Yeaw Nature Center in Carmichael. A lot of uncertainty circles us right now and being in nature provided a much-needed respite. We saw five baby deer leap across the trail. Two large bucks slam their antlers into each other until one relented and ran off. Squirrels scampering up and down the trees. Salmon jumping out of the river. It felt magical to have this time together.

I hope you enjoy this selection of images and may it bring you a moment of peace.

  • Photos were taken with an Olympus OM-D and edited with ON1 Photo RAW

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Poetry: Current Mood

Crawl out of mismatched blankets to shiver write, heater broken again.

Cracked heels bleed in fuzzy grey socks, add self-care to today’s to-do list.

Must hold breath another week for mental health help, therapists get sick.

Tears fall fast in upstairs bathroom, moms know the art of hidden sadness.

Can’t take another hit, cold sore erupts fat, ugly on bottom lip.

Coffee in my cup is ice already, but what I need is some warmth.

Write, write, write all my crisp inside words, but does anybody want them?

Inspired by Brandon Ellrich, I used the format of the American Sentence this week to explore some of my current feelings. If you are unfamiliar with this poetic form, it was Allen Ginsberg’s effort to make American the haiku. It must be seventeen syllables and it comes from the notion, “poets are people who notice what they notice.” Thank you for reading my first attempt at these.

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Photography: Feijoa Jam

We lived in our house for many years before discovering the fruit of the feijoa tree in the far right corner. I always appreciated its interesting pink and red flowers, but it wasn’t until my young son picked one of the fruits off the ground and took a bite I got really interested.

It’s a South American fruit, also known as a guavasteen or pineapple guava, and it’s got a mild and interesting flavor. The last few years I’ve harvested them and made them into muffins, but this year I decided to make jam to give away as Christmas presents.

If you are interested, the recipe I used is from a wonderful blog called The Fabulous Feijoa. You can also learn more about the history of the fruit in California and the world.

  • Photos were taken with an Olympus OM-D and edited with ON1 Photo RAW

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Photography: Autumn Walk

“He found himself wondering at times, especially in the autumn, about the wild lands, and strange visions of mountains that he had never seen came into his dreams.” ~ J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring

Tomorrow I embark on my third adventure into the lands of NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month). For those who don’t know, it’s an annual writing event in which participants write a 50,000-word manuscript during the month of November. It’s a huge undertaking. I’m a bit more nervous this year because of all the things going on in my life but also excited to rise to the challenge.

I spent four hours today outlining my project. The working title is “Bubbles in the Dark” and all of the characters are pulled from short stories I’ve written this year. It’s the tale of a mysterious shadow monster attacking a small coastal town slowly devouring the memories of those it touches. A young circus performer stumbles upon a possible answer but doesn’t know how to use it to help others. It’s a story of people bonding together during a time of crisis. A story of kindness found in chaos.

After my planning session, I took a nice hike near my house. It felt good to move my body and capture some of the beauty of autumn. I’ve included my favorite shots below. I hope they bring a smile to your face. Happy Halloween!

  • Photos were taken with an Olympus OM-D and edited with ON1 Photo RAW

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Poetry: The Princess and the Pumpkin

Once upon a time. Nightbirds
forget their songs. Twig fingers 
snap. Sunset shadows stretch beyond 
the dense thicket. Princess wakes.

Flowing red hair, starry blue 
eyes. Gossamer gown and dianthus 
lips. Sneaking outside with thin 
cobweb slippers and apple cheeks.

Tenebrous clouds tap dance through
black night sky. Faceless wolvie
packs roam the woods. Burrs 
grab delicate skin. She runs.

Gloomy twisty forest. An abandoned 
garden bed beneath a Linden 
tree. She curls inside orange
pumpkin’s sticky pulpy depths.

Empty dark monster hisses, spits 
poisonous lies. Heavy razor-clawed 
feet press firmly. Her golden
light slowly dims and fades.

Ravens call. Deers rush. Rabbits
thump. Her heart shoots free
flashing bright across the inky
wide open heavens. Fighting spirit.

Bold as sunflowers, lightning bolt
strong. She’s thick roots burrowed 
deep. An ocean wave thundering
along sandy shores. Princess survives.

*Dedicated to my strong girl. Keep fighting. I see you.

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Photography: Rickey Ranch Pumpkin Patch

“Sometimes I think that ideas float through the atmosphere like huge squishy pumpkins, waiting for heads to drop on.” -Neil Gaiman

If it’s not clear by now, I’m a huge fan of all things fall. Few things bring me as much joy as our annual family trip to Rickey Ranch Pumpkin Patch. This year, as we are facing some big family struggles, every smile felt brighter and every pumpkin more delightful.

Although we went during terrible lighting and most of my pictures didn’t really turn out, I’m happy to have captured the day. May it bring a smile to your face and drop some wonderful ideas onto your head.

  • Photos were taken with an Olympus OM-D and edited with ON1 Photo RAW

As a bonus happy photo, we recently adopted a new guinea pig. My daughter named her Toast the Ghost and she’s simply splendid.

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